I think it’s time we see other people. We have had a long relationship, and we have had lots of good times, but I just don’t love you like I used to. Oh yeah, and it’s not me, it’s you.
When we first got together you seemed so fresh and exciting. I got excited each week about what was coming, and I was never disappointed. You provided what I needed. You completed me. Recently, though, I can’t help but notice that you are letting yourself go. Too many of your teams don’t care any more - it’s like they are going out in public in sweat pants and slippers, and that’s not good. Every single week recently there is just so much garbage and so little to really get excited about. I have to make myself see you, and I have to convince myself to be excited every weekend when you come over. Most Monday nights I fake a headache to avoid your visit. That’s not how a relationship should be.
The final straw was when I was looking at the schedule for this coming weekend. You’re not even trying. When the most interesting game on the schedule is seeing if New England can beat the Jets by 25 points or 35 you have a problem, and I feel like it is my duty as a friend to tell you so you can get help. Jacksonville at Pittsburgh is an important game, but I’m at a place in our relationship that even that doesn’t excite me like it should. The color has been drained from the world when you are around - everything is just some shade of gray.
You’re probably wondering if there is someone else. There is. Several actually. I can watch almost any college football game and see passion, excitement and flashy plays. Most times when I see you I have to check to make sure that my TV is working properly because nothing is happening. College basketball is more authentic and passion-filled than you are. Heck, recently I have found myself thinking of the NBA while I am with you.
Remember how I used to have the biggest crush ever on Scarlett Johansson, but then she starting showing up everywhere and I didn’t care about her as much any more? Remember how I was so excited when I first discovered James Blunt, but then I starting hearing him every second of every day, and now the mere sound of his voice makes me kind of ill? That’s kind of how I feel about you. Everyone is talking about you, there is coverage about you constantly in every media outlet, and you will let any advertiser who throws you a few bucks use you in their advertising. Frankly, you’re a bit of an attention whore. It would be different if people always had new and interesting things to say about you, but I am sick of hearing more and more people saying the same things over and over again. You’re overexposed, and I am numb to your manufactured drama. The expectations from you grow seemingly every week, and you seem less and less able to live up to them.
We can still be friends. I’ll still look out for you from time to time, we can hang out most weekends, and I’ll track what you are up to - even if I don’t love you I will always care about you. I’ll still bet on you when it makes sense, and I won’t immediately change the subject if someone mentions you or leave the room if you are there. We just can’t be as big a part of each other’s lives as we have been. I don’t like the man I am when I spend too much time around you. You sometimes bore me, and when I am around you, frankly, I sometimes bore me.
We had a good run. Don’t make this harder than it needs to be. It’s probably best that you don’t try to contact me - I’ll find you when I am ready to see you again.
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